Your depression/anxiety "advokit"

For most people, life is rarely easy and for a lot of us…pain comes with. Some more than others. And it took me nearly my entire life to realize…depression

“Life Isn’t Complicated, People Are!”

Here’s what I’ve learned; and the foundation 'YourAdvoKit' was built Upon:

  • Our thoughts are not facts.
  • The seeds we plant; may never sprout, may sprout right away, or take years to sprout; but doesn’t mean you shouldn’t plant them just because there’s a bad one in the bunch.
  • What you put OUT into the universe, comes BACK to you – good or/and bad; positive and/or negative.
  • Dwelling on the negative, tragic events or the hardships you’ve been through creates an electrical charge in your brain; a sparking of sorts. Making you more anxious, depressed and nearly impossible to feel joy.

We build our own mountains from the mole hills we inherit, didn’t ask for or create for ourselves. We’re melodramatic, climatic, emotional, and tense - affecting most every area of our lives. Then we complain, we’re tired from climbing the stinkin’ mountain that we contributed to building for ourselves to scale! 

I’m in no way insinuating we create our own problems. Unfortunately, so many of us lack the skills needed to effectively handle them. We’re cut off at the knees, disabled, and disadvantaged; right out of the gate. Because most of us were never taught the skills needed to handle hardships, or even the smallest problems, as they occur.

We need to learn how to change that, love ourselves more; to live much healthier, happier lives.

I’ve suffered from so many forms of depression and anxiety since I was just a child.  But it was the many challenges I’ve faced in these last 14 years that not only increased the severity of my already shaky mental health; but nearly killed me.

In 2003 I began an uphill battle I didn’t ask for after contracting a rare infection that was resistant to antibiotics. I spent half a year in the hospital; and the next 2 years recovering. I was able to beat that infection…but only after the removal of my lower left lung where the infection set in and called home. 

After this particular struggle…my life would never be the same.

I hadn’t realized I was contributing to and enhancing the hardships that continued to follow; that at times, seemed unrelenting. That the person I’d morphed into just so I could “fit in” to a world I desperately wanted; was a much better person than given the credit and respect I deserved.

And in the end, caused irrepressible, and detrimental damage.

Moving Onward - Forward And Lessons Learned…

They say the things you’ve been through, the things you’ve done, you’ve said, the people’s lives you’ve touched and the fingerprint you’ve left behind or are making every day; define who you are and the mark you make in the world.

Do you know the mark you’re making? And do you even care if it’s had any value, influenced or helped someone else?

If you don’t, you should…because what you put into the universe, will come back to you. When you contribute to the better good, the better good will wrap her arms around you.

I’m not quite certain yet of mine. The impact it’s had or the one I’ll leave. But I sure do hope it’s been of a positive one! And I’ll never stop contributing, in any way I can, shape or form.

What I do know is this…

Hate - breeds hate, breeds hate, breeds hate…

and love- breeds love, breeds love ~

There’s but one judge, yours and mine. And every night before my head hits my pillow I pray He gives me the strength to be the best person I can be.

See, that wasn’t so complicated, now was it? And just one example of how I began un-complicating things for myself, and how you can too.

I'm telling really doesn't have to be so hard, so complicated; and you've the power within yourself to STOP. I'm here to tell you, you’re going to be okay. Or perhaps, a better way to say it would be…you’re going to be even better! An UNcomplicated better!

In any case and back to what I was saying…

 “We build our own mountains from the mole hills we inherit” [mental illness], “didn’t ask for” [in-laws with extreme mental illnesses or just downright nasty women] or “create for ourselves” [too many to list here].

But where we get into deep doo doo is when we over complicate. We allow are “thoughts” to become “facts;” i.e. “I think I’m a loser therefore I am.”

Just as bad…we allow what other people think of us [aka their opinions], become our own, and turn them into facts too! For example[s]: you’re ‘lazy,’ ‘fat,’ ‘stupid,’ ‘ugly,’ etc.”

This is a detrimental and dangerous mindset that’s all too common

  • We hold grudges
  • We sweat the small stuff
  • When they go low…we go low
  • We yell at the people we love the most when the person were most angry with is ourselves
  • We cry over spilled milk...and we are left...
  • Depressed and anxious

In the end...none of it really mattered. 

We over complicate…then over compensate. We wish someone would commiserate…instead, we’re left MISERABLE…alone…and tired.

I’ve gained strength from within my family. I’ve found peace, comfort and a way to heal, in my writing. But my most profound and personal finding has been…my faith.

This is what’s given me purpose; and my life…substance. What He’s given me is by far the strongest foundation to stand. On ground that was once shaky and with deep chasms.  Thank you, and I love you, Dear Jesus!

In these past several years, your response to “YourAdvokit,” and the words I’ve penned, whether in publication or within my story; have been remarkable. I’m so blessed and honored.

For me it’s confirmation that the things I’ve been through, the hardships, and illnesses that I once truly believed would kill me; were not in vain. And I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Before closing and a word of warning to the hateful or overly cranky; “YourAdvoKit” is a SAFE place. No haters allowed or tolerated. SORRY! 

Wait, no – I’m not!